It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize