quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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