well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Drake has all the answers
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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