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  • 92 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:03pm

    Did you sparkle afterwards?

  • 79 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 2:14pm

    If offered a hand job take it. No risk no obligation. It's like shaking hands. And to those naysayers..... I taught my wife how to give a proper hj and now she has more skills than me. She's Luke to my yoda

  • 77 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:28pm

    you must be 13 yrs old because who the fuck actually wants a handjob??

  • 80 84
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:06pm

    who the fuck gives handjobs these days? blowjobs are the new goodnight kiss. wtf

  • 59 54
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 2:01pm

    twilight is erotic fiction for preteen girls. don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

  • 61 61
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:03pm

    Twilight is never good. Even if it gets you a handjob

  • 62 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 6:49pm

    A hand job is a man's job. A blow job is her job.

  • 53 48
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 2:02pm

    Fuck handjobs. I would rather jack off myself then let a girl do it. You should of at least got a blowjob.

  • 57 56
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:56pm

    If you are 12 years old then i am impressed and it only gets better. If not you should keep that to yourself cause you suck at life

  • 51 46
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 11:19pm

    June, buddy. Good luck!

  • 43 35
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 1:50am

    11:13, you rock bud! Damned selfish republicans know NOTHING!! Go suck one if you hate on me.

  • 53 56
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 3:15pm

    The first time I watched twilight was the night I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me. Oh, the memories...

  • 54 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:02pm

    Just a handjob? Well, it looks like you didn't have to watch it to get it, so you still win.

  • 47 48
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 8:29pm

    oh, wow. I love how everyone defaults to 12.

  • 59 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:38pm

    Just a handjob? Guess she wasn't that "full of love"

  • 45 45
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 3:31pm

    who brags about a handjob?

  • 44 44
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 8:28pm

    what are you, twelve?

  • 57 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 12:47pm

    Most of you are probably a bunch of nerds who couldn't even get a handjob if you wanted. Handjob by the right girl are great because someone else is actually touching your dicks. But we all know how you inside people like to touch yourself since no one else will

  • 47 50
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 2:44pm

    the fact that she gave you only a hand job says a lot about twilight fans to me. fucking grow up and dish out real goods, or go the fuck home! only 16 year-olds should be subjecting poor fools to hand jobs.

  • 52 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 2:37pm

    lol you used a star wars reference for getting handjobs

  • 50 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 4:42pm

    It did but expect a hand job from Jakob or edward

  • 60 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:01pm

    Nice. Twilight still sucks bawls though. I guess in your case it caressed them.

  • 42 48
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 2:28pm

    you gotta find better ways to get paid than 1 handjob a year

  • 49 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:58pm

    Handjob is a mans job.

  • 42 49
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 4:20pm

    June 30th 2010. To the person below me: hahahaha ur wrong!! Get it right!!

  • 51 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 12:54am

    I think it's funny how Harry Potter fans think they're legit since Twilight came out. You're still not.

  • 35 38
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 1:21pm

    If they are young, that would mean that people are right when they say twilight is a way to sell sex to young girls, haha

  • 42 53
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 2:04pm

    Should've handed her some chloraseptic spray and told her it's for train her gag reflex, Now do work son!!!

  • 45 59
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 11:38pm

    Fuck twilight But shoulda had a BJ

  • 46 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 1:57pm

    HAND JOB !! LOL Are you 12?

  • 41 53
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 12:38am

    fuck handjobs... I watched, came back and had sex with my fiance :P

  • 46 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 12:46am

    Yaaay Colorado hand jobs!!

  • 44 61
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 1:49pm

    Handjob is pussy shit, tell her to fuck or suck these nuts or get the hell out. A handjob pssh, you can do that yourself and probably 10x better than she can...man up

  • 36 45
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:31pm

    it already came out.

  • 43 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 4:37pm

    yeh... i dnt get whts so great about handjobs, i can giv myself one of those w/e, now as for blowjobs...

  • 42 59
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 6:20am

    Not gonna lie; this is funny. Twilight reference or not.

  • 46 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 9:37pm

    handjobs fucking suck. id rather jerk off than get a handjob. blowjob+ or gtfo

  • 39 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 9:42pm

    Either you suck it or fuck it or get the hell out...what are you in 8th grade getting a handjob. I can give myself a better handjob than any girl, tell her to fuck off...

  • 53 85
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 1:02pm

    I think she was full of cum from the first guy she visited after the movie. Didn't need you to top her off.

  • 45 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:05pm

    maybe if u got a blowjob it would b cool

  • 40 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 4, 10 at 10:59pm

    Who wants handjobs when you can do it better yourself?

  • 39 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 2:07am

    Democratic son of Satan? Go shove a bible up your ass, altar boy.

  • 31 45
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 2:06pm

    Dick isn't gonna suck it self!?!

  • 33 50
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 2:07pm

    Who still gives handjobs? Are you in 7th grade?

  • 40 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 12:19am

    My loose boxer shorts feel better than a girls handjob.

  • 36 56
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 7:31pm

    Wait who the fuck finds an analog between handjobs and Star Wars?

  • 39 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 10:28pm

    That's all you got? And she's a Twi-Tard? How fat is she?

  • 36 59
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 3:25am

    You either suck it, fuck it, or leave I alone. Cause you can't stroke me like I can on my own.

  • 34 56
    Submitted by ronasokily on Jul 11, 10 at 5:36pm

    possibly the best thing to ever happen as an effect of twilight

  • 46 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 11:13pm

    Fuck republicans !!!!

  • 47 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 1:29pm

    Fuck that.... Tell her to suck it, fuck it, or leave it alone

  • 38 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 11:30pm

    So what if he is young. Hand job is good for the kids who cares

  • 38 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 4:59pm

    408 and 420...your Both losers!

  • 33 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 2, 10 at 9:52am

    Yo I don't know what you guys are talkin about. This man is lucky. He did NOTHING and just got a handjob. Talk about haveing your Cake and eatting it to

  • 45 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 25, 09 at 5:47am

    A handjob? That bs excuse for doing something. Man if she would've came over and did that to me. Yea. She wouldn't be there for long. Kick her ass out. Handjob. Lame ass shit.

  • 37 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 25, 09 at 12:32am

    Fuck you 11:13 nov 22

  • 33 61
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 6:49pm

    a handjob, that's it?

  • 32 59
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 2:09pm

    Wait, really? Isn't that the opposite of what this Mormon bullshit supposed to be all about?

  • 29 54
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 7:37pm

    If you watch Twilight (@November 22, 2009 3:15PM) you deserve everything you got. Harsh, but sorry, the movie, the books and everything about them are vile.

  • 28 52
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 6:43pm

    Good thing it wasn't actual sex, who knows what kind of STDs she had.

  • 46 89
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 12:56pm

    As long as you didn't have to watch it...just take what you can get lol

  • 36 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 7:05am

    Dude...fuck hand jobs. Unless you're 12, then good job kid. But step it up next time, get that dick wet.

  • 34 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 5:13pm

    Wow a hj? What is this 8th grade

  • 29 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 12, 09 at 2:19pm

    Sucks you get handjobs.

  • 32 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 7:21pm

    sounds like your in jr high. find someone else whos not a freak

  • 46 99
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 1:03pm

    big pussy....you can give yourself a handjob. You need to sack up and shove the one-eyed monster down her throat for chrissake

  • 24 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 22, 09 at 11:24pm

    11:13 go the fuck away you democratic son of Satan

  • 26 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 28, 09 at 5:40am

    sucks your sex life is based on movie release dates.

  • 30 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 23, 09 at 11:47am

    im a girl and i would have gave you something other than a hand job. [unless your 12] haha