I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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