just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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