Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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