i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize