im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize