This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize