Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize