"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
