I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.