I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.