Texts From Last Night

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(907): View more from Alaska

scale of 1-10 how well do I give head

(1-907): View more from Alaska

5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.

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(907): scale of 1-10 how well do I give head (1-907): 5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish. http://tfl.nu/uclv

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me

(617): View more from Massachusetts

What? You're not speaking real words.

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(423): I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me (617): What? You're not speaking real words. http://tfl.nu/o2go

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count

(1-609): View more from New Jersey

You don't understand. I'm not like you.

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(609): Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count (1-609): You don't understand. I'm not like you. http://tfl.nu/ja4i

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(312): View more from Illinois

i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.

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(312): i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id. http://tfl.nu/1l5p

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(708): View more from Illinois

i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!

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(708): i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES! http://tfl.nu/1ytt

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(905): View more from Toronto

Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?

(1-905): View more from Toronto

i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood

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(905): Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse? (1-905): i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood http://tfl.nu/oc9k

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(225): View more from Louisiana

shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this

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(225): shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this http://tfl.nu/x9rq

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(318): View more from Louisiana

i was rollin on her like bob the builder

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(318): i was rollin on her like bob the builder http://tfl.nu/6lwa

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(410): View more from Maryland

You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.

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(410): You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out. http://tfl.nu/phll

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(763): View more from Minnesota

So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time

(1-763): View more from Minnesota

Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.

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(763): So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time (1-763): Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother. http://tfl.nu/6l4l

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(301): View more from Maryland

you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.

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(301): you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop. http://tfl.nu/0o9n

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(713): View more from Texas

wait, did i just see you litter out your window??

(281): View more from Texas

umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.

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(713): wait, did i just see you litter out your window?? (281): umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out. http://tfl.nu/y9ae

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(253): View more from Washington

I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.

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(253): I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby. http://tfl.nu/itl7

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(913): View more from Kansas

is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?

(312): View more from Illinois

you sound like my dream girl

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(913): is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us? (312): you sound like my dream girl http://tfl.nu/joww

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.

(1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

Girl's gotta have her standards.

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(780): Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years. (1-780): Girl's gotta have her standards. http://tfl.nu/3849

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