Texts From Last Night · Worst Nights of the Month

Worst Nights of the Month

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(952): View more from Minnesota

I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.

(952): View more from Minnesota

Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.

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(952): I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face. (952): Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him. http://tfl.nu/f0ba

Replies (2) Good night (354) Bad night (77)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.

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(919): We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad. http://tfl.nu/qk8s

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.

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(505): Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis. http://tfl.nu/t3p3

Replies (1) Good night (438) Bad night (76) Order T-Shirt
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(618): View more from Illinois

One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.

(1-618): View more from Illinois

Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!

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(618): One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat. (1-618): Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research! http://tfl.nu/3g8w

Replies (6) Good night (1068) Bad night (76)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk

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(503): Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk http://tfl.nu/l7fc

Replies (9) Good night (391) Bad night (75) Order T-Shirt
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(860): View more from Connecticut

I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me

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(860): I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me http://tfl.nu/egc4

Replies (4) Good night (448) Bad night (75)
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(425): View more from Washington

I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday

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(425): I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday http://tfl.nu/6bnr

Replies (1) Good night (293) Bad night (74) Order T-Shirt
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.

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(479): Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing. http://tfl.nu/uted

Replies (2) Good night (460) Bad night (73)
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(647): View more from Ontario

Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm

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(647): Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm http://tfl.nu/f115

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(240): View more from Maryland

Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you

(1-240): View more from Maryland

Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina

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(240): Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you (1-240): Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina http://tfl.nu/ytzu

Replies (7) Good night (805) Bad night (71)
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(434): View more from Virginia

Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night

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(434): Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night http://tfl.nu/pi3r

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(816): View more from Missouri

You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex

(816): View more from Missouri

...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship

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(816): You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex (816): ...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship http://tfl.nu/eny9

Replies (2) Good night (757) Bad night (68)
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(256): View more from Alabama

Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.

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(256): Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention. http://tfl.nu/44p2

Replies (4) Good night (483) Bad night (68) Order T-Shirt
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(641): View more from Iowa

Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..

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(641): Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good.. http://tfl.nu/el3i

Replies (2) Good night (325) Bad night (67) Order T-Shirt
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(818): View more from California

Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.

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(818): Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great. http://tfl.nu/bj70

Replies (1) Good night (279) Bad night (66) Order T-Shirt

Worst Nights of the Month

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