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I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
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