Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Arkansas (870)

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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.

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  (870): Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds. http://tfl.nu/xv3v
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  Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"

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  (870): Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty" http://tfl.nu/dezg
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  You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform

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  (870): You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform http://tfl.nu/z93z
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  She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.

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  (870): She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call. http://tfl.nu/dsl8
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  It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?

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  (870): It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you? http://tfl.nu/rq03
  Replies (2) Good night (967) Bad night (3135)
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  you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.

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  (870): you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions. http://tfl.nu/7qp6
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  I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".

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  (870): I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible". http://tfl.nu/e3k3
  Replies (43) Good night (7523) Bad night (1352)
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  At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!

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  (870): At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins! http://tfl.nu/8m62
  Replies (19) Good night (5691) Bad night (509)
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  i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.

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  (870): i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off. http://tfl.nu/vonx
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  just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.

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  (870): just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here. http://tfl.nu/j596
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  I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..

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  (870): I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance.. http://tfl.nu/o07j
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  Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.

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  (870): Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine. http://tfl.nu/j38c
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  I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.

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  (870): I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership. http://tfl.nu/f8ej
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  You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"

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  (870): You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call" http://tfl.nu/7z02
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  The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!

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  (870): The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!! http://tfl.nu/bjxs
  Replies (31) Good night (3726) Bad night (1094) Order T-Shirt