Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Illinois (309)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night. http://tfl.nu/9na7
  Replies (1) Good night (981) Bad night (635) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Too low?

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Yes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd. (309): Too low? (224): Yes. http://tfl.nu/cgtr
  Replies (4) Good night (1733) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins' http://tfl.nu/d755
  Replies (9) Good night (1720) Bad night (804) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s http://tfl.nu/9pu3
  Replies (13) Good night (1181) Bad night (586) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks. http://tfl.nu/3xq6
  Replies (7) Good night (2768) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel http://tfl.nu/08pr
  Replies (8) Good night (1152) Bad night (347) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me. (708): Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you. http://tfl.nu/his2
  Replies (3) Good night (2504) Bad night (397)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash. http://tfl.nu/otoe
  Replies (2) Good night (431) Bad night (1246) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough. http://tfl.nu/3hvx
  Replies (3) Good night (507) Bad night (973) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it http://tfl.nu/dnda
  Replies (7) Good night (852) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap. http://tfl.nu/l0kn
  Replies (8) Good night (1978) Bad night (429) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience. http://tfl.nu/wh3c
  Replies (8) Good night (1764) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are. http://tfl.nu/35z0
  Replies (4) Good night (812) Bad night (1353)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better. http://tfl.nu/6a1r
  Replies (2) Good night (1058) Bad night (741) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion... http://tfl.nu/v1ex
  Replies (3) Good night (2582) Bad night (538) Order T-Shirt