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i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
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