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SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
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