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I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
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