Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Alabama (256)

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  There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen

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  (256): There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen http://tfl.nu/2fvb
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  Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.

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  (256): Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO. http://tfl.nu/k62i
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  Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.

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  (256): Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program. http://tfl.nu/l90z
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  Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.

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  (256): Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation. http://tfl.nu/su8c
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  Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.

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  (256): Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you. http://tfl.nu/bzso
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  I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.

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  (256): I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body. http://tfl.nu/ulji
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  I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.

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  (256): I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was. http://tfl.nu/06et
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  just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level

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  (256): just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level http://tfl.nu/5gsk
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  Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment

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  (256): Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment http://tfl.nu/eim1
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  Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....

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  (256): Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea.... http://tfl.nu/8lgf
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  i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?

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  Stay away from his face.

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  so i go for his dick?

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  (852): i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do? (256): Stay away from his face. (852): so i go for his dick? http://tfl.nu/3ce2
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  Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.

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  That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.

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  (256): Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload. (1-256): That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man. http://tfl.nu/ruio
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  Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed

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  (256): Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed http://tfl.nu/b65f
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  I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?

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  (256): I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much? http://tfl.nu/gx9s
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  she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.

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  (256): she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy. http://tfl.nu/z1ta
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