Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New Jersey (862)

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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin

  (1-862): View more from New Jersey

  doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you

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  (862): watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin (1-862): doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you http://tfl.nu/gtrz
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming

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  (862): this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming http://tfl.nu/d5m0
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  win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight

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  (862): win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight http://tfl.nu/0j1g
  Replies (22) Good night (3571) Bad night (1315) Order T-Shirt
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  found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"

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  (862): found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later" http://tfl.nu/lryz
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  I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.

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  (862): I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you. http://tfl.nu/ld05
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  I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.

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  (862): I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word. http://tfl.nu/hy59
  Replies (21) Good night (5006) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
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  dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf

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  (862): dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf http://tfl.nu/c2bo
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  My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job

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  (862): My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job http://tfl.nu/i0ci
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  my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.

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  (862): my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around. http://tfl.nu/z3u8
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  nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.

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  Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.

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  yet...

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  (732): nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug. (732): Needless to say there is no second date for this girl. (862): yet... http://tfl.nu/och4
  Replies (44) Good night (768) Bad night (6052)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?

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  (862): so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge? http://tfl.nu/lcjy
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  you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"

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  (862): you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen" http://tfl.nu/7vz2
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  She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.

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  (862): She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times. http://tfl.nu/p78w
  Replies (22) Good night (4420) Bad night (546)
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  :( I miss blowjobs.

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.

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  (862): :( I miss blowjobs. (973): This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had. http://tfl.nu/jn5t
  Replies (22) Good night (2761) Bad night (699)
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  i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge

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  (862): i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge http://tfl.nu/uife
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