Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (310)

Last Night in California (310)

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I think I won the penis lottery.

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(310): I think I won the penis lottery. http://tfl.nu/0aks

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Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.

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(310): Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove. http://tfl.nu/uua4

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I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.

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(310): I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today. http://tfl.nu/yukz

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Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.

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Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.

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(310): Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them. (310): Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light. http://tfl.nu/t4oe

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ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.

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(310): ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude. http://tfl.nu/5a88

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It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.

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(310): It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples. http://tfl.nu/vzvv

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my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook

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(310): my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook http://tfl.nu/wl7n

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tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room

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(310): tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room http://tfl.nu/5l09

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I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work

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(310 ): I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work http://tfl.nu/s1zl

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that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something

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its my fault though, i'm wearing tights

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you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap

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(310): that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something (818): its my fault though, i'm wearing tights (310): you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap http://tfl.nu/15rb

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just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.

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now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!

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whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?

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(310): just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy. (310):now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!! (310):whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea? http://tfl.nu/30gl

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Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.

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(310): Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask. http://tfl.nu/1jf3

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I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...

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(310): I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on... http://tfl.nu/l298

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Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.

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(310): Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat. http://tfl.nu/8e48

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I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high

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(310): I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high http://tfl.nu/hr6z

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Last Night in California (310)

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