Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Texas (903)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week. http://tfl.nu/2lhm
  Replies (18) Good night (1051) Bad night (2498) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks. http://tfl.nu/2ww3
  Replies (11) Good night (416) Bad night (2298) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?! http://tfl.nu/tpho
  Replies (19) Good night (1085) Bad night (2287) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer

  (214): View more from Texas

  ... I'm KD

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer (214): ... I'm KD http://tfl.nu/mzja
  Replies (38) Good night (516) Bad night (2151)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk" http://tfl.nu/2chc
  Replies (5) Good night (690) Bad night (2143) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties http://tfl.nu/1e23
  Replies (74) Good night (572) Bad night (1951) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair... http://tfl.nu/9cft
  Replies (17) Good night (918) Bad night (1930) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion. http://tfl.nu/pxq1
  Replies (15) Good night (583) Bad night (1823) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone http://tfl.nu/vw3h
  Replies (5) Good night (820) Bad night (1728) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while. http://tfl.nu/y23x
  Replies (21) Good night (7248) Bad night (1620)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad. http://tfl.nu/idc2
  Replies (6) Good night (695) Bad night (1577) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand. http://tfl.nu/dh2g
  Replies (13) Good night (2397) Bad night (1293) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit. http://tfl.nu/92kz
  Replies (21) Good night (5402) Bad night (1285) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss. http://tfl.nu/y1tc
  Replies (5) Good night (470) Bad night (1180)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch". http://tfl.nu/00r2
  Replies (18) Good night (5224) Bad night (1134) Order T-Shirt