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my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
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