Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Rhode Island (401)

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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  wrong asian. never thought that would happen.

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  (401): wrong asian. never thought that would happen. http://tfl.nu/96tp
  Replies (16) Good night (1175) Bad night (3891) Order T-Shirt
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  Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.

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  (401): Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick. http://tfl.nu/vuwe
  Replies (17) Good night (1204) Bad night (4115) Order T-Shirt
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  he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.

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  (401): he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/e3p6
  Replies (36) Good night (878) Bad night (4928) Order T-Shirt
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  We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.

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  (401): We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night. http://tfl.nu/piwb
  Replies (12) Good night (8032) Bad night (1072) Order T-Shirt
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  I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.

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  (401): I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on. http://tfl.nu/shul
  Replies (22) Good night (4403) Bad night (1050) Order T-Shirt
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  Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.

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  (401): Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out. http://tfl.nu/h447
  Replies (10) Good night (4654) Bad night (523) Order T-Shirt
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  and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping

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  (401): and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping http://tfl.nu/w61z
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  she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina

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  not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote

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  (401): she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina (804): not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote http://tfl.nu/mq8t
  Replies (33) Good night (939) Bad night (4035)
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  how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?

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  (401): how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards? http://tfl.nu/ktqz
  Replies (66) Good night (16997) Bad night (1898) Order T-Shirt
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  you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck

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  (401): you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck http://tfl.nu/4wd4
  Replies (28) Good night (5691) Bad night (874) Order T-Shirt
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  Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.

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  (401): Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night. http://tfl.nu/eotk
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  Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.

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  (401): Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex. http://tfl.nu/0okh
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  They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.

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  (401): They should make Glad Forceflex condoms. http://tfl.nu/qnot
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  If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.

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  (401): If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side. http://tfl.nu/pfes
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  The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge

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  (401): The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge http://tfl.nu/3yfn
  Replies (32) Good night (530) Bad night (4928) Order T-Shirt