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and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Michael Bay diarrhea
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i think i have herpe
just one?
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
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