Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Follow @tfln