Texts From Last Night

Last Night in North Carolina (910)

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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home

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  (910): my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home http://tfl.nu/9si8
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination

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  (910): I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination http://tfl.nu/u6pu
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.

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  (910): I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth. http://tfl.nu/zk0y
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.

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  (910): We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works. http://tfl.nu/uib3
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  i should start naming my morning wood

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  great idea but wrong number

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  (910): i should start naming my morning wood (201): great idea but wrong number http://tfl.nu/1p5a
  Replies (24) Good night (8095) Bad night (954)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.

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  (910): ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality. http://tfl.nu/m81e
  Replies (5) Good night (1404) Bad night (3437) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...

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  (910): when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going... http://tfl.nu/keeg
  Replies (106) Good night (1465) Bad night (10308)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.

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  (910): He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts. http://tfl.nu/0rlv
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did

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  (910): Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did http://tfl.nu/f390
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.

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  (910): so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch. http://tfl.nu/syjm
  Replies (57) Good night (16785) Bad night (1008)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway

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  (910): so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway http://tfl.nu/w82l
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  WTF??? Isn't he married??

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL

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  (910): He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding. (605): WTF??? Isn't he married?? (910): Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL http://tfl.nu/eb9x
  Replies (19) Good night (906) Bad night (4187)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants

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  (910): so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants http://tfl.nu/bero
  Replies (42) Good night (521) Bad night (11799)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick

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  (910): I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick http://tfl.nu/ykrr
  Replies (23) Good night (508) Bad night (5561) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'

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  (910): it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!' http://tfl.nu/7tsr
  Replies (24) Good night (10432) Bad night (626)