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apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
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