Texts From Last Night

wildcatsbabe527's Favorites Texts:

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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.

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  (231): Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted. http://tfl.nu/tphx
  Replies (29) Good night (1035) Bad night (3639) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay

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  (404): i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay http://tfl.nu/pvcx
  Replies (16) Good night (4996) Bad night (3297)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt

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  (814): I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt http://tfl.nu/8loq
  Replies (8) Good night (524) Bad night (2119)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?

  (573): View more from Missouri

  IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation

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  (573): just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch (636): Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving? (573): IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation http://tfl.nu/yr3e
  Replies (29) Good night (6892) Bad night (2112)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  How high are you?

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  (561): Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter. (1-561): How high are you? http://tfl.nu/9cbn
  Replies (18) Good night (750) Bad night (1343)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.

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  (773): He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date. http://tfl.nu/geei
  Replies (5) Good night (298) Bad night (1250) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.

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  (530): My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/pzgc
  Replies (13) Good night (3744) Bad night (1091)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.

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  (410): Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad. http://tfl.nu/fe6u
  Replies (12) Good night (319) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.

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  (740): Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party. http://tfl.nu/kjr7
  Replies (6) Good night (3484) Bad night (955) Order T-Shirt
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  (212): View more from New York

  I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday

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  (212): I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday http://tfl.nu/8t4e
  Replies (3) Good night (527) Bad night (867) Order T-Shirt
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally

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  (605): He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally http://tfl.nu/nljb
  Replies (3) Good night (326) Bad night (837) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?

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  (910): He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went? http://tfl.nu/tksy
  Replies (12) Good night (438) Bad night (816) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?

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  (321): Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding? http://tfl.nu/i6fm
  Replies (15) Good night (1124) Bad night (808) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?

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  (701): Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave? http://tfl.nu/y6y0
  Replies (17) Good night (4653) Bad night (807) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all

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  (970): So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all http://tfl.nu/hnjr
  Replies (6) Good night (358) Bad night (789) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...

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  (616): took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding... http://tfl.nu/s10s
  Replies (2) Good night (454) Bad night (747) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.

  (847): View more from Illinois

  It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.

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  (847): Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic. (847): It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word. http://tfl.nu/kmzp
  Replies (9) Good night (2635) Bad night (721)
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  (226): View more from Ontario

  I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.

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  (226): I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday. http://tfl.nu/cgf7
  Replies (5) Good night (1310) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!

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  (701): He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time! http://tfl.nu/6xbr
  Replies (27) Good night (1919) Bad night (710) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.

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  (301): The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able. http://tfl.nu/bzys
  Replies (60) Good night (3796) Bad night (709)
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  (916): View more from California

  WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.

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  (916): WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN. http://tfl.nu/3mw6
  Replies (8) Good night (3252) Bad night (709) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.

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  (613): somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder. http://tfl.nu/ofdw
  Replies (2) Good night (181) Bad night (704) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore

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  (706): If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore http://tfl.nu/b6gx
  Replies (14) Good night (3634) Bad night (675) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.

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  (972): Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life. http://tfl.nu/6m4u
  Replies (10) Good night (2259) Bad night (643) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto

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  (215): i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto http://tfl.nu/4zou
  Replies (6) Good night (328) Bad night (638) Order T-Shirt
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.

  (1-701): View more from North Dakota

  Jesus, are you hammered?

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.

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  (701): Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus. (1-701): Jesus, are you hammered? (701): Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws. http://tfl.nu/johl
  Replies (26) Good night (3756) Bad night (634)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.

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  (570): He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall. http://tfl.nu/bycp
  Replies (17) Good night (1498) Bad night (596) Order T-Shirt
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Are we hungover?

  (713): View more from Texas

  I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.

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  (254): Are we hungover? (713): I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it. http://tfl.nu/8xx2
  Replies (5) Good night (1888) Bad night (574)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?

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  (270): We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job? http://tfl.nu/b7v3
  Replies (17) Good night (1013) Bad night (566) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.

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  (509): Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life. http://tfl.nu/zh07
  Replies (6) Good night (1411) Bad night (565) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.

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  (406): Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life. http://tfl.nu/9594
  Replies (12) Good night (1080) Bad night (552)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.

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  (508): I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking. http://tfl.nu/mdga
  Replies (16) Good night (1956) Bad night (545) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  yeah...that's gonna come up in court

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  (816): yeah...that's gonna come up in court http://tfl.nu/wily
  Replies (3) Good night (799) Bad night (545) Order T-Shirt
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  (438): View more from Quebec

  Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.

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  (438): Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up. http://tfl.nu/g79y
  Replies (4) Good night (1212) Bad night (540)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?

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  (603): I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night? http://tfl.nu/pz1o
  Replies (3) Good night (202) Bad night (516)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I cant shower it involves moving...

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.

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  (317): I cant shower it involves moving... (219): Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame. http://tfl.nu/d6ka
  Replies (8) Good night (2265) Bad night (494)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.

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  (301): Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours. http://tfl.nu/5jwu
  Replies (10) Good night (3250) Bad night (489) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.

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  (218): You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes. http://tfl.nu/x3hi
  Replies (8) Good night (1832) Bad night (486) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom

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  (516): We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom http://tfl.nu/tkh6
  Replies (8) Good night (2118) Bad night (474) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.

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  (586): Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie. http://tfl.nu/2smm
  Replies (7) Good night (1817) Bad night (454) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..

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  (641): Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough.. http://tfl.nu/n0x6
  Replies (11) Good night (249) Bad night (453) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below

  (773): View more from Illinois

  When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"

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  (773): We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below (773): When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!" http://tfl.nu/bs1p
  Replies (4) Good night (1721) Bad night (441)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.

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  (706): I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart. http://tfl.nu/7g13
  Replies (3) Good night (1064) Bad night (437) Order T-Shirt
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.

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  (812): Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome. http://tfl.nu/9uj2
  Replies (9) Good night (1393) Bad night (429)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.

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  (616): Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening. http://tfl.nu/2jna
  Replies (7) Good night (1195) Bad night (421)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know

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  (413): styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know http://tfl.nu/4o79
  Replies (9) Good night (1192) Bad night (417) Order T-Shirt
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.

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  (434): Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them. http://tfl.nu/1lvf
  Replies (19) Good night (1415) Bad night (408) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.

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  (480): Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight. http://tfl.nu/9xmn
  Replies (3) Good night (1129) Bad night (406) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Vodka?

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Forever.

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  (703): Vodka? (202): Forever. http://tfl.nu/90ug
  Replies (7) Good night (1285) Bad night (404)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato

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  (708): you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato http://tfl.nu/7tnq
  Replies (3) Good night (2366) Bad night (387) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.

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  (937): I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it. http://tfl.nu/wtlk
  Replies (8) Good night (2174) Bad night (372) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL

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  (201): I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL http://tfl.nu/z2bq
  Replies (7) Good night (1387) Bad night (353) Order T-Shirt
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  (325): View more from Texas

  We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."

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  (325): We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget." http://tfl.nu/mx4s
  Replies (4) Good night (1733) Bad night (352) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?

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  (920): Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations? http://tfl.nu/lkp9
  Replies (7) Good night (1307) Bad night (348)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.

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  (405): SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine. http://tfl.nu/9wmu
  Replies (3) Good night (1678) Bad night (347)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?

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  (519): Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night? http://tfl.nu/5y2j
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him

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  (859): I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him http://tfl.nu/eehd
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym

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  (781): Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym http://tfl.nu/lv47
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.

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  (423): What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face. http://tfl.nu/y7fo
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.

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  (410): I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex. http://tfl.nu/2gjc
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.

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  (870): When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody. http://tfl.nu/gc8j
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  (310): View more from California

  I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.

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  (310): I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it. http://tfl.nu/9g38
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  (805): View more from California

  the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick

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  (805): the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick http://tfl.nu/e696
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.

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  (248): Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels. http://tfl.nu/9jex
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev

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  (270): Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev http://tfl.nu/bqo9
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  That's my new pick up line call me a polish name

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  (773): And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad. (1-773): That's my new pick up line call me a polish name http://tfl.nu/jbx5
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.

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  (859): I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything. http://tfl.nu/z1ef
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.

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  (410): Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience. http://tfl.nu/sg6n
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  (925): View more from California

  Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.

  (650): View more from California

  Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.

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  (925): Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to. (650): Its a good thing to know for upcoming events. http://tfl.nu/a1ga
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today

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  (570): woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today http://tfl.nu/g1oy
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.

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  (304): I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here. http://tfl.nu/t14q
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.

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  (218): I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately. http://tfl.nu/wrd1
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am

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  (224): I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am http://tfl.nu/pfco
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  (254): View more from Texas

  We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.

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  (254): We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans. http://tfl.nu/t9r6
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.

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  (480): It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning. http://tfl.nu/0fqk
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.

  (269): View more from Michigan

  AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.

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  (269): That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE. (269): AND SOME IN THE TRUNK. http://tfl.nu/jicm
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?

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  (417): So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty? http://tfl.nu/l95a
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