Texts From Last Night · surfingpanda's Favorites

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surfingpanda's Favorites Texts:

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(952): View more from Minnesota

You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear

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(636): View more from Missouri

So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.

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(607): View more from New York

Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(310): View more from California

i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.

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(419): View more from Ohio

Why is your signature on my underwear?

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(313): View more from Michigan

I painted my nails silver

(586): View more from Michigan

And what are the implications of that?

(313): View more from Michigan

Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien

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