Texts From Last Night · sarahalicedancer's Favorites

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sarahalicedancer's Favorites Texts:

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(352): View more from Florida

she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.

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(214): View more from Texas

It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.

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(314): View more from Missouri

the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.

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(602): View more from Arizona

Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(609): View more from New Jersey

i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast

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(304): View more from West Virginia

He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.

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(440): View more from Ohio

i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

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