Texts From Last Night · fart's Favorites

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fart's Favorites Texts:

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(410): View more from Maryland

He asked if I wanted to "hang out"

(410): View more from Maryland

A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,

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(334): View more from Alabama

He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(406): View more from Montana

apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b

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(260): View more from Indiana

My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck

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