Texts From Last Night

Young_Quake09's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that. http://tfl.nu/u65f
  Replies (3) Good night (2026) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head. http://tfl.nu/w9hs
  Replies (19) Good night (2603) Bad night (523) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features. http://tfl.nu/e715
  Replies (10) Good night (1791) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  What time did you start drinking?

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Maybe.

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Maybe isn't a time...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): What time did you start drinking? (978): Maybe. (617): Maybe isn't a time... http://tfl.nu/r4p5
  Replies (14) Good night (5874) Bad night (631)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face http://tfl.nu/in3q
  Replies (6) Good night (659) Bad night (1554) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below

  (773): View more from Illinois

  When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below (773): When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!" http://tfl.nu/bs1p
  Replies (4) Good night (1721) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea" http://tfl.nu/kx8t
  Replies (7) Good night (1912) Bad night (464) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that? http://tfl.nu/m9eq
  Replies (6) Good night (2206) Bad night (608) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be http://tfl.nu/jh2s
  Replies (11) Good night (594) Bad night (2536) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (435): Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night http://tfl.nu/xeqd
  Replies (19) Good night (1747) Bad night (1026) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism. http://tfl.nu/5vu2
  Replies (5) Good night (1519) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect. http://tfl.nu/cd2m
  Replies (4) Good night (2929) Bad night (634) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls. http://tfl.nu/u1ub
  Replies (5) Good night (2889) Bad night (451) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke? http://tfl.nu/jbqp
  Replies (13) Good night (4109) Bad night (809) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!! http://tfl.nu/3a3w
  Replies (4) Good night (1191) Bad night (637) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.

  (1-304): View more from West Virginia

  Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us. (1-304): Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat? (304): No there was a goat. I gave it a donut. http://tfl.nu/bds8
  Replies (15) Good night (6262) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms. http://tfl.nu/i073
  Replies (3) Good night (1465) Bad night (645) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?

  (1-574): View more from Indiana

  meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band? (1-574): meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis? http://tfl.nu/hzbs
  Replies (8) Good night (1922) Bad night (498) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (636): Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent http://tfl.nu/1tsa
  Replies (12) Good night (1889) Bad night (635) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized http://tfl.nu/hh8z
  Replies (16) Good night (2496) Bad night (498) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face" http://tfl.nu/0o08
  Replies (53) Good night (10536) Bad night (1478) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now? http://tfl.nu/s9tm
  Replies (11) Good night (3880) Bad night (707) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over. http://tfl.nu/abn4
  Replies (8) Good night (3107) Bad night (657) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  ... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): ... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace http://tfl.nu/lenw
  Replies (11) Good night (747) Bad night (1822) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing" http://tfl.nu/qoaq
  Replies (9) Good night (4169) Bad night (783) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on? http://tfl.nu/pffh
  Replies (54) Good night (9899) Bad night (868) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty. http://tfl.nu/rhpp
  Replies (29) Good night (7022) Bad night (914) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  how did the keg end up in the top bunk?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): how did the keg end up in the top bunk? http://tfl.nu/zpng
  Replies (11) Good night (2690) Bad night (557) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house? http://tfl.nu/bc2r
  Replies (14) Good night (9369) Bad night (2184) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her. http://tfl.nu/6ypm
  Replies (49) Good night (17464) Bad night (923)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream. http://tfl.nu/kpop
  Replies (8) Good night (978) Bad night (2785) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet. http://tfl.nu/v7qv
  Replies (10) Good night (956) Bad night (3477) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up http://tfl.nu/3pu3
  Replies (16) Good night (683) Bad night (4873) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again. http://tfl.nu/qw6q
  Replies (50) Good night (19646) Bad night (1993) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time http://tfl.nu/omxi
  Replies (4) Good night (1123) Bad night (2066) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country. http://tfl.nu/04vq
  Replies (18) Good night (5654) Bad night (763) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me. http://tfl.nu/tnbf
  Replies (9) Good night (3840) Bad night (955) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now. http://tfl.nu/xg11
  Replies (16) Good night (6663) Bad night (2092) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  he fucked my hip out of place.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): he fucked my hip out of place. http://tfl.nu/0lgh
  Replies (11) Good night (5109) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell. http://tfl.nu/5mii
  Replies (7) Good night (3278) Bad night (1338) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about http://tfl.nu/idfh
  Replies (23) Good night (1281) Bad night (6080) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset. http://tfl.nu/s72o
  Replies (7) Good night (3829) Bad night (838) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest http://tfl.nu/b35x
  Replies (20) Good night (5247) Bad night (1864)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating. http://tfl.nu/umg8
  Replies (34) Good night (17061) Bad night (1407) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping. http://tfl.nu/l6f0
  Replies (7) Good night (4469) Bad night (1440) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster. http://tfl.nu/974x
  Replies (14) Good night (7655) Bad night (1313) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  a search helicopter?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): a search helicopter?! http://tfl.nu/5l8d
  Replies (25) Good night (5159) Bad night (1059) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked http://tfl.nu/576t
  Replies (31) Good night (722) Bad night (9743) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away http://tfl.nu/6kvy
  Replies (20) Good night (1088) Bad night (5613) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): 12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began http://tfl.nu/mu8u
  Replies (21) Good night (5126) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night. http://tfl.nu/0cve
  Replies (71) Good night (1389) Bad night (6134) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo http://tfl.nu/loae
  Replies (18) Good night (9860) Bad night (1216) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime http://tfl.nu/yqbs
  Replies (24) Good night (4060) Bad night (852) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward http://tfl.nu/dpap
  Replies (358) Good night (59129) Bad night (7125) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" . http://tfl.nu/721o
  Replies (9) Good night (6293) Bad night (975) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic. http://tfl.nu/hh2b
  Replies (33) Good night (3873) Bad night (4960) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool (252): Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five http://tfl.nu/6bci
  Replies (13) Good night (6131) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat http://tfl.nu/5lfj
  Replies (63) Good night (11483) Bad night (1876) Order T-Shirt