Texts From Last Night

Texts from March, 2012

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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.

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  (317): Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing. http://tfl.nu/j9h2
  Replies (16) Good night (1652) Bad night (443) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  Agreed.

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  (303): There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree? (1-303): Agreed. http://tfl.nu/l0rd
  Replies (7) Good night (1251) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.

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  (707): After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing. http://tfl.nu/fnd4
  Replies (10) Good night (456) Bad night (925)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die

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  (919): Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die http://tfl.nu/o1vm
  Replies (4) Good night (1302) Bad night (486) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.

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  (415): Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked. http://tfl.nu/gx9q
  Replies (3) Good night (542) Bad night (903) Order T-Shirt
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2

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  (336): He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2 http://tfl.nu/rjqf
  Replies (5) Good night (1951) Bad night (434)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Found the puke drawer

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  (910): Found the puke drawer http://tfl.nu/lcvb
  Replies (6) Good night (391) Bad night (1612) Order T-Shirt
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.

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  (260): Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed. http://tfl.nu/ajvn
  Replies (5) Good night (2149) Bad night (572) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next

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  (612): They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next http://tfl.nu/mqm0
  Replies (1) Good night (379) Bad night (863) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE

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  (256): OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE http://tfl.nu/qfju
  Replies (6) Good night (2125) Bad night (471) Order T-Shirt
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me

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  (504): i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me http://tfl.nu/qsky
  Replies (9) Good night (1997) Bad night (461) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.

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  (318): Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head. http://tfl.nu/6vvp
  Replies (7) Good night (1990) Bad night (372) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.

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  (716): Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day. http://tfl.nu/hsum
  Replies (4) Good night (1087) Bad night (442)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.

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  (202): I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery. (202): That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics. http://tfl.nu/1mv0
  Replies (28) Good night (2817) Bad night (911)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.

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  (647): so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together. http://tfl.nu/0wgb
  Replies (14) Good night (844) Bad night (3112)