Texts From Last Night · August, 2012

Texts from August, 2012

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(773): View more from Illinois

Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?

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(773): Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents? http://tfl.nu/nffm

Replies (4) Good night (678) Bad night (368)
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(631): View more from New York

He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.

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(631): He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes. http://tfl.nu/wcz4

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!

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(843): Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics! http://tfl.nu/lxnu

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(227): View more from Maryland

He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like

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(227): He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like http://tfl.nu/muep

Replies (13) Good night (1233) Bad night (409) Order T-Shirt
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(951): View more from California

I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.

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(951): I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day. http://tfl.nu/elsi

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(520): View more from Arizona

Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.

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(520): Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk. http://tfl.nu/speg

Replies (11) Good night (978) Bad night (359)
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(515): View more from Iowa

So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?

(1-515): View more from Iowa

Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....

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(515): So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night? (1-515): Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something .... http://tfl.nu/8iom

Replies (10) Good night (2072) Bad night (404)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Last time i carry you out of a forest

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(262): Last time i carry you out of a forest http://tfl.nu/h410

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(828): View more from North Carolina

i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?

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(828): i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am? http://tfl.nu/68cf

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(303): View more from Colorado

The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....

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(303): The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING.... http://tfl.nu/av21

Replies (7) Good night (1811) Bad night (337)
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(804): View more from Virginia

I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.

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(804): I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up. http://tfl.nu/0inz

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(207): View more from Maine

I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.

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(207): I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table. http://tfl.nu/sbpv

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(336): View more from North Carolina

That boy needs some memories to take back home with him

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(336): That boy needs some memories to take back home with him http://tfl.nu/bmt8

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(+88): View more from

I swear the crows are laughing at me.

(1+88): View more from

You my friend are stoned into submission

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(+88): I swear the crows are laughing at me. (1+88): You my friend are stoned into submission http://tfl.nu/466h

Replies (8) Good night (918) Bad night (276) Order T-Shirt
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.

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(919): Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face. http://tfl.nu/tvg8

Replies (1) Good night (793) Bad night (356) Order T-Shirt

Texts from August, 2012

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