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Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
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