Texts From Last Night

Texts from May, 2011

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  (219): View more from Indiana

  They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.

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  (219): They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves. http://tfl.nu/j0o7
  Replies (9) Good night (1131) Bad night (2136) Order T-Shirt
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  (+49): View more from Germany

  Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.

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  (+49): Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom. http://tfl.nu/2s5g
  Replies (6) Good night (2659) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.

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  (406): He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana. http://tfl.nu/b27k
  Replies (9) Good night (2932) Bad night (710) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.

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  (503): We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status. http://tfl.nu/0tgg
  Replies (3) Good night (2179) Bad night (771) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.

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  (303): Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life. http://tfl.nu/utnc
  Replies (7) Good night (964) Bad night (3912)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.

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  (509): I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore. http://tfl.nu/24ew
  Replies (10) Good night (912) Bad night (1999) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.

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  (972): I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night. http://tfl.nu/hauh
  Replies (8) Good night (2115) Bad night (621) Order T-Shirt
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.

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  (662): She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina. http://tfl.nu/uqet
  Replies (7) Good night (3821) Bad night (727)
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  (619): View more from California

  he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up

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  (619): he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up http://tfl.nu/8iri
  Replies (5) Good night (1980) Bad night (818) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.

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  (248): So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection. http://tfl.nu/x1ov
  Replies (11) Good night (812) Bad night (5363) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.

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  (920): Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit. http://tfl.nu/du3n
  Replies (1) Good night (958) Bad night (2067) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?

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  (416): Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it? http://tfl.nu/zi0h
  Replies (6) Good night (3532) Bad night (921)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.

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  (563): at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck. http://tfl.nu/kym8
  Replies (6) Good night (1877) Bad night (947) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.

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  (910): You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year. http://tfl.nu/jiz9
  Replies (12) Good night (3754) Bad night (796) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?

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  (616): Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past. (616): I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures? http://tfl.nu/o51k
  Replies (4) Good night (2779) Bad night (1233)