Texts From Last Night

Texts from December, 2010

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.

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  (203): My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression. http://tfl.nu/go1x
  Replies (52) Good night (1066) Bad night (5017) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?

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  (919): are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet? http://tfl.nu/54if
  Replies (14) Good night (4114) Bad night (1036) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.

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  (614): It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead. http://tfl.nu/yvss
  Replies (11) Good night (873) Bad night (3686) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade

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  (717): It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade http://tfl.nu/l96w
  Replies (9) Good night (4413) Bad night (915) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am

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  (415): there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am http://tfl.nu/m06t
  Replies (2) Good night (855) Bad night (2156) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....

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  (480): i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera.... http://tfl.nu/on9i
  Replies (25) Good night (2554) Bad night (4463) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.

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  (206): I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me. http://tfl.nu/t4ey
  Replies (3) Good night (950) Bad night (2894) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.

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  (310): Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius. http://tfl.nu/qlyj
  Replies (30) Good night (1638) Bad night (4313)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.

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  (315): I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism. http://tfl.nu/5nmw
  Replies (8) Good night (3483) Bad night (866) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.

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  (937): i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage. http://tfl.nu/bqw6
  Replies (22) Good night (1716) Bad night (8355)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.

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  (404): i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college. http://tfl.nu/cy12
  Replies (4) Good night (3358) Bad night (1286) Order T-Shirt
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.

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  (251): I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing. http://tfl.nu/enjf
  Replies (6) Good night (2156) Bad night (1158) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....

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  (210): Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later..... http://tfl.nu/qwdm
  Replies (1) Good night (5050) Bad night (978) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer

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  (815): i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer http://tfl.nu/m7hl
  Replies (12) Good night (6039) Bad night (1158) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there

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  (646): All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there http://tfl.nu/jsjn
  Replies (12) Good night (4098) Bad night (1312) Order T-Shirt