Texts From Last Night · February, 2012

Texts from February, 2012

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"

(239): View more from Florida

I am the fairy godmother of the drink.

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(724): I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED" (239): I am the fairy godmother of the drink. http://tfl.nu/ryur

Replies (3) Good night (2072) Bad night (509)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea

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(651): Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea http://tfl.nu/mdyc

Replies (14) Good night (737) Bad night (1059) Order T-Shirt
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(530): View more from California

I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.

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(530): I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out. http://tfl.nu/bpyp

Replies (14) Good night (564) Bad night (1624)
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(616): View more from Michigan

She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross

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(616): She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross http://tfl.nu/ueo2

Replies (18) Good night (860) Bad night (2709) Order T-Shirt
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(516): View more from New York

I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.

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(516): I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology. http://tfl.nu/5jdj

Replies (6) Good night (474) Bad night (918) Order T-Shirt
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(204): View more from Manitoba

Ugh he's texting me.

(1-204): View more from Manitoba

Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.

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(204): Ugh he's texting me. (1-204): Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess. http://tfl.nu/6r54

Replies (5) Good night (1458) Bad night (490) Order T-Shirt
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(518): View more from New York

HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.

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(518): HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR. http://tfl.nu/dsxu

Replies (12) Good night (1822) Bad night (664) Order T-Shirt
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(478): View more from Georgia

Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.

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(478): Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy. http://tfl.nu/ujmz

Replies (15) Good night (3253) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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(206): View more from Washington

Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her

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(206): Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her http://tfl.nu/6f57

Replies (4) Good night (2240) Bad night (376) Order T-Shirt
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(303): View more from Colorado

How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?

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(303): How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads? http://tfl.nu/o7ne

Replies (10) Good night (1558) Bad night (445) Order T-Shirt
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(910): View more from North Carolina

i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit

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(910): i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit http://tfl.nu/ocpj

Replies (18) Good night (3877) Bad night (589)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.

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(724): Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies. http://tfl.nu/sr2h

Replies (17) Good night (2622) Bad night (433) Order T-Shirt
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(778): View more from British Columbia

Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.

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(778): Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house. http://tfl.nu/6cay

Replies (6) Good night (570) Bad night (942)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"

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(306): I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth" http://tfl.nu/c8fv

Replies (6) Good night (1731) Bad night (643) Order T-Shirt
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.

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(724): I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic. http://tfl.nu/fuww

Replies (11) Good night (1916) Bad night (648) Order T-Shirt

Texts from February, 2012

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