Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (916)

Last Night in California (916)

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i want you now

(916): View more from California

you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this

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(212): i want you now (916): you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this http://tfl.nu/8egt

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(916): View more from California

You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..

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(916): You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you.. http://tfl.nu/8fyi

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(916): View more from California

rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war

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(916): rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war http://tfl.nu/t68o

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(916): View more from California

She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.

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(916): She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk. http://tfl.nu/9b1u

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A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.

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(916): A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever. http://tfl.nu/cexy

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(916): View more from California

Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.

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(916): Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus. http://tfl.nu/w1gl

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(916): View more from California

I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night

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(916): I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night http://tfl.nu/fggv

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It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.

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(916): It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her. http://tfl.nu/zc22

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He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.

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(916): He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head. http://tfl.nu/7dxe

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(916): View more from California

i think i have herpe

(1-916): View more from California

just one?

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(916): i think i have herpe (1-916): just one? http://tfl.nu/e1l6

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(916): View more from California

My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.

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(916): My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded. http://tfl.nu/57ez

Replies (49) Good night (1151) Bad night (4395)
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We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.

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(916): We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame. http://tfl.nu/u712

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(916): View more from California

Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be

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(916): Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be http://tfl.nu/iw79

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keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something

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(916): keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something http://tfl.nu/d7nj

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(916): View more from California

Michael Bay diarrhea

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(916): Michael Bay diarrhea http://tfl.nu/1hpz

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Last Night in California (916)

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