Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Follow TFLN on Twitter
Favorite
