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  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 11:26am

    You should have pretended to wake up because of the fart noise, and asked her what song she was singing...

    • Submitted by instantaxess on Jul 9, 11 at 3:02am

      BadMitch farts in their mouth and they say thank you, www.badmitch.com

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 19, 09 at 3:09am

    hahahahahhahahahahahaha i was just laughing so hard that i farted too

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 27, 09 at 8:52pm

    This made me laugh so hard. So proud this came from 902!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 1:27pm

    "fail...the first thing i do at any party i plan to get smashed at is mark the girl that is cute before i'm shitfaced with a sharpie on the wrist and check when i'm shitfaced for the mark...no mark no go" that's classic!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 15, 09 at 7:43pm

    screw pretending to be asleep! if i heard that i would've jumped up and been like "shh! did you hear that?" (with a serious look on my face) and then go back to pretending to be asleep! lol

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 7, 09 at 8:21pm

    i think i know who this is about, i just died laughing.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 3:49am

    fail...the first thing i do at any party i plan to get smashed at is mark the girl that is cute before i'm shitfaced with a sharpie on the wrist and check when i'm shitfaced for the mark...no mark no go

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 7, 09 at 6:48pm

    Thats some sitcom quality shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 6:25pm

    So funny I snort laughed at work.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 4, 09 at 3:23am

    its not even that funny.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 2, 09 at 1:19am

    I would have blew the fake sleeping by laughing so hard at her man thats funny

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 26, 09 at 6:20pm

    this is freaking hilarious, but it's interesting to me how no one feels bad for this girl... at all. i mean that's never happened to me, but god i'd feel like a fucking piece of shit. damn. lol

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 8:19am

    From which orifice did the fart emanate?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 24, 09 at 8:38pm

    so she farted big deal get over it.. if a guy did that it would be no big deal. And if u really didn't want to sleep with her because she wasn't attractive enough for u then why did u lead her on? ur an ass. It's not all about the looks guys so get over yourselves.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 28, 09 at 12:05pm

    "so she farted big deal get over it.. if a guy did that it would be no big deal. And if u really didn't want to sleep with her because she wasn't attractive enough for u then why did u lead her on? ur an ass. It's not all about the looks guys so get over yourselves." are you one of those girls? are you ugly?

    • Submitted by HULKSMASH on Apr 16, 10 at 8:52am

      This is obviously a woman... Don't take away from this brilliant text, if you are going so deep into it as to ask why lead her on etc... You have missed the point and comedic value of this text and this website entirely.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 19, 09 at 12:20pm

    Scotia bitchessssss!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 28, 09 at 2:48am

    incredible night! actually legend-ary status

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 7, 09 at 6:29pm

    LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 1:50pm

    Wow. I thought this only happened with my friends. huh.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 9, 09 at 5:22pm

    great text...i wonder how many times i fart after drinking beer when i have dudes over...

  • Submitted by CCF on Feb 21, 10 at 6:30pm

    SHAMMMUUUUU

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 1:10am

    LMAO, pretty pathetic on both parts..

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 10, 09 at 6:44am

    yay! Halifax repersent!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 1, 09 at 12:18am

    Best text on this site!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 11, 09 at 11:22pm

    Classic thats all I have to say.. I died laughing at that text. How many times have stupid chicks freaked out during sex

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 15, 09 at 3:04pm

    hahahahahaha i never laughed so hard over something i read on the internet.. then i looked and seen 902 and i laughed even harder

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 15, 09 at 9:08pm

    hahah, i just laughed so hard i hit my head on the wall.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 11:18am

    hahahahahahahahahaha!

  • Submitted by HULKSMASH on Apr 16, 10 at 8:51am

    This is obviously a woman... Don't take away from this brilliant text, if you are going so deep into it as to ask why lead her on etc... You have missed the point and comedic value of this text and this website entirely.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 2, 09 at 7:13pm

    Holy Shit laughed hard :D classic

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 24, 09 at 7:23pm

    That's Nova Scotia for ya. Fucking awesome.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 14, 09 at 1:06am

    All that happened like over the span of an hour or one consecutively after the other (within 5-7 minutes)?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 7, 09 at 10:56pm

    I feel like this was probably me....

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 1:51am

    hahahaa that is suuuuch a good night

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 2:21am

    beer does make u fart. loudly.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 7, 09 at 6:03am

    this is my new favorite

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 23, 09 at 3:06pm

    Awesome!!!!!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 17, 09 at 8:48pm

    HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH OH MY FUCKING GOD!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 12, 09 at 7:41pm

    Fucking right! Must be and Islander! LOL

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 8, 09 at 4:48pm

    This girl isn't at all British, by any chance? Probably not, only it's the kind of thing we do all the time over here (the attractive ones too, not just the trolls), just wondered...

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 16, 09 at 6:10am

    "if i had a quarter for every girl who did that to me...."I had one for every rez ive lived on!!..too funny

  • Submitted by Raella69 on Apr 30, 10 at 8:42pm

    Hahaha.

  • Submitted by 902adhd on Mar 14, 10 at 1:21pm

    sounds like me

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 17, 09 at 1:29am

    bahahhahahahahha I laughed so hard it made me snort.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 9, 09 at 10:43pm

    so she was the sexless innkeeper?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 10:09pm

    love it!!!! hahahahhahaha

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 5:11pm

    Oh my good lord, I've never been that girl, but my fuck, is that funny. You're an ass, but this was a classic. Maritimes represent! NB over here!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 12, 09 at 6:19pm

    This must be about a girl name Amy in the masters program at USC... who is clingy and has abandoment issues. you have been warned.. shes crazy... but can deep throat a cock like a pro!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 11:07pm

    Are you sure that you aren't one of ugly troll women?* Sorry xD

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 8, 09 at 8:56pm

    Clearly this is actually a Good Night, since you didn't do it.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 20, 09 at 8:54am

    oh my god. THAT WAS ME. I'm dead serious. I swear on my mother's life. ... I don't know which is the saddest. 1) admitting to that. 2) swearing about something so stupid on my mothers life or 3) doing it to begin with.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 5, 09 at 1:59am

    I seriously die every time I read this! I read it out loud to my friends and it just gets better omg ahahaha

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 18, 09 at 1:47am

    lmfao. gosh poor girl, sounds like something that would happen to me while pmsing LMFAO

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 16, 10 at 1:53am

    December 9, 2009... Please qoute How I met your mother more...

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 6:30pm

    omfg if that happened to me, im pretty sure i would burst out laughing!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 26, 09 at 7:24pm

    WOW, ARE YOU SURE IT WAS A FART THAT YOU SMELLED, IT COULD HAVE BEEN HER FERFUME! ONE TIME I GAVE A DRUNK WOMAN A REDE TO HER HOME AND SHE TOOK A PEE ON MY TENNIS SHOES TURNING THEM YELLOW.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 23, 09 at 10:33am

    i like how nobody even paid attention to the fact that the girl this is about was replying in the thread!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 12, 09 at 8:30pm

    hahahaha. i just burst out laughing.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:16am

    this really is my favorite

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 9, 09 at 6:19am

    hahahahahahahah! Lmfao! The greatest text from all time right here folks......!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 13, 09 at 11:29pm

    Haha, guess who's going to love you when you grow up? No one! Nice job

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 2, 09 at 10:57pm

    I would have blown the fake sleeping by confessing an uncontrollable fart fetish just to see what she would do

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 21, 09 at 6:39pm

    HAHAHA I think the best part of the texts are the replies. I love this website.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 11, 10 at 5:43pm

    WHOA she farted!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 21, 09 at 7:14pm

    lmao that would be hard as balls to stay pretend sleepin after she did that shit

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 31, 09 at 8:33pm

    I think "and then she farted" could be added to any text to makre it funny. Everybody end every text you sned in the next week with "and then she farted"and let's see how many get posted.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 10, 09 at 5:21pm

    lol fat, ugly chicks

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 10:08am

    Ahaha this ones my favorite

  • Submitted by summer77 on Jun 30, 10 at 9:34pm

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA i love nova scotia, so funny

  • Submitted by hobolo on Apr 26, 10 at 2:17am

    So scotian..

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 28, 09 at 9:48pm

    NS Represent!!!!!!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 31, 09 at 9:27pm

    Lmao you should have not been such an asshole, but im laughing really, really hard so IDC but i should lol

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 13, 09 at 3:30pm

    funniest shit ive ever read

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 2, 10 at 11:08pm

    Tht'll mak u say shamwow

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 18, 09 at 2:36pm

    hahahahhahahahahhahahahhaha...OMG posts like these are going to get me fired from work...im dying out loud at the office

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 28, 09 at 1:27am

    Lol, this would have been retarded without the.......then she farted part. XD

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 8, 09 at 8:08pm

    lmao ew at herrr, what the hell.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 6, 09 at 8:57pm

    Definately best "Fail" on here!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 9, 09 at 6:03pm

    thats frigging hilairious

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 3, 09 at 11:07am

    That's some funny shit

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 16, 09 at 10:41am

    fucking funny ass shit

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 8:58pm

    hahahahahahahahahahahah

  • Submitted by 586/248 on Apr 18, 10 at 10:04pm

    Best part is " and then she farted" lmao

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 12:02am

    this text made my night. thank you. lol.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 7, 09 at 8:15pm

    She is ugly. Tell her to lay off the beer. It will make you fart every time.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 13, 09 at 9:08pm

    This is a nightmare I know all too well...

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 16, 09 at 3:06pm

    This text made me laugh out loud like crazy! great Story.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 7, 09 at 9:43pm

    BHAHAA omg Thank GOD That never happens to me

  • Submitted by doucher13 on Jun 15, 10 at 6:24pm

    How did continue to fake sleep after that I woulda laughed my ass off

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 24, 10 at 11:10pm

    Hahaha, this is the best

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 21, 09 at 3:16pm

    this shit is funny!!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 5:16pm

    I was just going to suggest PEI too. Who knows. Hilarious everywhere.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 7:12pm

    HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAHAH

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 17, 09 at 2:41am

    hahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha im dieing! this is great.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 18, 09 at 11:13pm

    WELL THATS DOWN RiGHT HiLARiOUS..! WOW..!! GOOD NiGHT..lOL!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 12, 09 at 6:17pm

    Oh you wacky Canadians

  • Submitted by Dude4Real on Oct 3, 10 at 11:30pm

    Not necessarily Nova Scotia dude. Could be PEI.

  • Submitted by kelser on Dec 19, 10 at 8:58pm

    Hhhhaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

  • Submitted by screw4virginity on Jun 28, 10 at 12:30pm

    Sounds like somethin Snoki's date would do

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 2, 10 at 8:12pm

    bahahahahahaha that's hilarious.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 9:52pm

    u r too ugly... just accpet it... oh, and don't let the door hit u in ur big fat ass on the way out my door

  • Submitted by EroticHillbilly on Jan 31, 11 at 1:53am

    Makes me ashamed of being Nova Scotian...

  • Submitted by Epimetheus on May 27, 10 at 9:38pm

    Christ, I would not be physically able to not laugh

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 12, 09 at 11:19pm

    hahahaha definitely my favorite ever. can you even imagine? wow.

  • Submitted by hyper31337 on Sep 13, 10 at 1:29pm

    11:26 you almost made me laugh out loud( very loudly) while in the bathroom stall at work lmao!!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 9, 10 at 7:15pm

    SHE IS A FUCKIN PIG

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 12, 09 at 1:13am

    this is by far the funniest text on here! HILARIOUS!!

  • Submitted by AlterBoi on Jun 29, 10 at 3:06pm

    This could almost be on MLIA but maybe not.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 2, 09 at 2:40am

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLocaust!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 4:06am

    Haha

  • Submitted by Jayroo on Dec 12, 10 at 3:18am

    I think I might have to move to the 902 now. That's pretty amazing.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on May 8, 09 at 5:41pm

    give that bitch some imodium

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 25, 09 at 11:05pm

    Because 10:33AM she's probably lying. May 24, 2009 8:38PM- As for you. I'm sure one of those incredibly ugly troll things aren't you?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 9, 09 at 6:18pm

    I've read this before, and I'm STILL laughing my ass off...what chick farts audibly, ever? ESPECIALLY after trying to convince a guy to fuck her...

  • Submitted by alexlacey88 on Dec 7, 10 at 12:49am

    omg that was so effing hilarious

  • Submitted by Brady24 on Mar 1, 11 at 11:52pm

    Haha

  • Submitted by planks on Oct 4, 10 at 8:17am

    Id just roll over and go "hi 5 girl"

  • Submitted by Anonymous007 on Jun 30, 11 at 1:16pm

    Haha :) well better then most nights...

  • Submitted by makingPUTAShorny on Jan 6, 11 at 3:35am

    Lmao@she then farted.

  • Submitted by devil_pup on Sep 22, 11 at 1:24am

    If you don't wanna do her just tell her that you're not drunk enough. That way you get to be a royal ass and she will almost always think you meant that you were too drunk. Classic.

  • Submitted by oliviagily on Mar 10, 11 at 7:24pm

    HAHAHAHA I'm dying laughing! I would've shot up and been like, "did you hear that?!"

  • Submitted by Izboy on Oct 7, 11 at 10:39am

    What do all the numbers mean before texts?

  • Submitted by ShutYourTuna on Jun 28, 12 at 9:59pm

    OMG I laughed so hard I snorted!

  • Submitted by Fumbls on Nov 23, 11 at 8:31pm

    Teacher asked what I was laughing at when I read this. Told them "fart joke" and class continued

  • Submitted by thesteveholt on Apr 7, 12 at 10:19pm

    Thats a keeper

  • 92 83
    Submitted by photorobert on May 24, 12 at 9:25pm

    hahaha no empathy do feel for you!