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  • 96 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 1:01pm

    BACON IS GOOD FOR ME

  • 89 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 12:00pm

    This site should be renamed, randomshititexted

  • 82 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 1:27pm

    12:14, I love when that happens to me! and why to call this text. effing awesome! Love, Roxy

  • 87 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 11:52am

    Haha I don't think I want to know..

  • 82 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 1:27pm

    *And way to call this text**

  • 79 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 12:01pm

    a sign on you back that said "ass-fuck me"?

  • 80 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 4:18pm

    There's nothing better than waking up to pretzels stuck to your nude body

  • 78 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 4:42pm

    A little poo on my lip. Uh, tlk about a little embarrasing!

  • 77 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 12:06pm

    As long as it wasn't a colostomy bag, you're okay.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 1:02pm

    You wanna know how I got these scars? -Joker

  • 79 94
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 12:02pm

    a 5-dollar bill and a thank-you note

  • 71 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 11:59am

    Oh I get it! It's funny because they probably woke up with something silly stuck to them! -Jeff

  • 71 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 1, 09 at 4:07am

    That's cool, but I wouldn't tell you what I found stuck to me this morning.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 2:23pm

    It was my penis... stuck to your butthole.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 12:14pm

    (in mom voice) did someone "superman that ho" last night? "aww, that's my girl!!"