Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize