whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize