I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize